This album is a crime against music. Send 6ix9ine back to jail.
“A collection of profound and epic album reviews and musical articles by former astronaut and brain surgeon, Alasdair Kennedy. Reaching levels of poetry that rival Keats and Blake, the following reviews affirm Alasdair to be a prodigy, a genius and a god whose opinion is always objectively right. He is also without a doubt the most modest man in the universe.” - Alasdair Kennedy
Showing posts with label trap. Show all posts
Showing posts with label trap. Show all posts
Tuesday 20 October 2020
Monday 20 July 2020
Tuesday 23 July 2019
Thursday 11 April 2019
Review of 'Harverd Dropout' by Lil Pump
Despite evidently not being able to spell (or rap for that matter), Lil Pump is a self-made
millionaire at 18 - and he’s decided to spend his new album telling everyone
that school is for losers.
Thursday 15 November 2018
Friday 14 September 2018
Thursday 16 August 2018
Friday 10 November 2017
Sunday 16 July 2017
Sunday 26 June 2016
Monday 10 August 2015
Review of 'Free Weezy Album' by Lil Wayne
‘Woo this that shit you didn’t want me on’ the Louisiana rapper opens
the album with to the accompaniment of a soaring choral beat followed by some
genuinely tight flows. For a brief moment I was genuinely excited. Lil Wayne
seemed to have upped his game, finally scrapping the bland poppy beats and
actually riding these beats instead slurring over them like a drunkard.
Monday 22 June 2015
Review of '32 Zel/Planet Shrooms' by Denzel Curry
The hip hop community are going to start getting serious
bedsores if they continue to sleep on this Floridian rapper any longer. Sporting
some of the tightest flows and creative beats in the game, this dude is a clear
mile ahead of every other trap rapper in the game.
Wednesday 3 June 2015
Review of 'AT.LONG.LAST.A$AP' by A$AP Rocky
New York emcee, A$AP Rocky, has become one of the more prominent
names in the trap rap scene largely for his quirky metrosexual fashion sense
(remember that time he once wore a skirt) and his banging selection of beats (the main appeal to
me). When it comes to his actual rapping ability, there's not much to separate him from others in the game. His flow is adept and he’s a lot less annoying than some of his autotune-warbling contemporaries, but at the end of the day he’s just another
dude spitting about money, drugs and bitches (which is fine if you’re not a
lyric snob like me).
AT.LONG.LAST.A$AP
sees Rocky taking influence from trip hop and ‘old 60s psychedelic shit’. At 18 tracks, it’s not the most concise
album in the world, but it does manage to keep up the pace. Arguably, the best
tracks are left until last. ‘Better Things’ might just be the prettiest here,
swiftly followed by the hardest track ‘M’$’, that’ll make you want to fix your
car with hydraulics. ‘Everyday’
meanwhile features a killer boom-bap beat courtesy of Mark Ronson, plus vocal
features from Miguel and – of all people – Rod Stewart (although I’m pretty
sure it’s just a sample).
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Me whilst listening to 'M'$' |
Altogether, the album relies hard on guest performances.
There are lots of names to gawp at. Many disappoint – I knew I’d find M.I.A.
and Future’s verses annoying, but I expected more from Kanye who spends his
bars rhyming the same word with the same word: ‘sometimes the best advice, is no advice, especially when it’s your
advice’. Lil Wayne is the only surprise here, laying down a killer verse on
‘M’$’. Like his performance on the recent Tyler album, he proves he can
actually ride a beat instead of delivering the slurry nonsense we’re all used
to.
I’m yet to research into who exactly Joe Fox is, but he
seems to contribute the most guest performances on this record, largely
bringing the ‘old 60’s psychedelic shit’
influence. Four tracks feature folksy-sung hooks from him. They feel like something
Eminem might do, except without the cheesiness that was all over The Marshall
Mathers LP 2. In fact, Joe Fox’s recurring appearances seem to give the album
the motif it needs, stopping it from becoming a jumbled mess and giving it all
a sense of cohesion.
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I Googled 'Joe Fox' and a picture of Tom Hanks came up. I am none the wiser. |
The album ends with perhaps the most poignant of all the
guests – a spoken section from Rocky’s recently-passed mentor, A$AP Yams. For
me this is one of the best tracks here, not because of sentimental value, but
because Rocky really seems to be rapping his ass off on it. It’s the only real
song where Rocky sounds like he’s pushing his ability, and not simply cruising.
Maybe we can expect more of this in the future. For now, the beats are still
the clincher.
★★★☆☆
TRACK TASTER:
Thursday 30 April 2015
Review of 'Barter 6' by Young Thug
This album wasn’t the turd I expected it to be. For one
there’s no annoying autotune and less dying cat warbles. In fact, the drug-addled
metrosexual Atlanta rapper is actually spitting on most of these tracks, some
of his flows regretfully impressing me. The trap beats aren’t all bad either – some
are generic, but others like ‘Constantly Hating’ and ‘Dream’ have a spacey and
atmospheric vibe more akin to Drake’s recent album. That all said, Young Thug’s
lyrics are yet to see any improvements, still consisting of the same clichés and
nonsense as before. ‘I am a beast, I am
obese’ is a genuine line from this record as is ‘I want that neck like a giraffe/ I like fish in water, I’m a bear’.
I guess there’s a certain goofiness to it that’s entertaining, but it’s nothing
on Riff Raff. Overall, Young Thug just seems to be trying to sound more like his
idol Lil Wayne. Given that Thugga has already stolen Wayne’s look, given that
the title of this album was originally going to be ‘The Carter 6’, it’s no
surprise that Young Thug is now trying to steal Lil Wayne’s sound (all under
the influence of evil puppeteer Birdman of course). Fans may praise Young Thug’s
originality, but personally I’m yet to see it. He just strikes me as a wannabe-Lil-Wayne - which I think you'll agree is fairer than my previous criticisms on this blog.
★★☆☆☆
TRACK TASTER:
Monday 16 March 2015
Review of 'Rebel Heart' by Madonna
There are few
fifty-six year old pop stars that would dare to sing over a dirty Diplo-produced
trap beat. There are also few fifty-six year old pop singers that would dare to
sing about drugs, cunnilingus and the art of being a bitch in such explicit
detail as can be found on this album.
It’s admirable that after all these years Madonna is
still making music that’s current and controversial. Back in the eighties, songs
such as ‘Like a Virgin’ were pushing the sexual boundaries of pop music. By today’s
standard such a track is tame. In fact it’s hard to make a genuinely shocking
sex song in 2015 and yet on Rebel Heart,
Madonna somehow manages it – the Kanye-produced ode-to-oral-sex ‘Holy Water’
containing lines as outrageous as ‘Yeezus
loves my pussy best’.
![]() |
Kanye produces several of the beats on this record. |
It’s crude. It’s hilarious. It’s embarrassing. It’s commendable.
The ageist part of me thinks that she’s simply too old for this shit. However,
the more liberal part of me respects her for not doing what every other
middle-aged musician does. Quite frankly, it would have been too easy for the
pop icon to do a folksy right-of-passage album about her life lessons.
Similarly, it would have been too easy for her to jump on the eighties-revival
bandwagon and continue churning out retro hits like Duran Duran and more
recently Kylie.
Instead, Madonna has gone the hard route and tried to play
catch-up with the edginess of today’s divas – the Mileys and Kanyes of this
world. The result is an album that’s semi-ridiculous in its arrogance and shock
value. Containing track titles such as ‘Bitch I’m Madonna’ and an entire song
dedicated to the illuminati, Rebel Heart
is a diamond chandelier of gimmickry. Half the songs make you think to
yourself ‘did that just happen? Did
Madonna really just do a song with Chance the Rapper and Mike Tyson? Did
Madonna really just dedicate an entire track to her ladyparts?’
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Yep, Mike Tyson is on this album. lolwot |
Known for taking herself rather too seriously at times, one could argue that a lot of the songs' boastful and outrageous moments prove that the Queen of Clubs does in fact have a sense of humour. Indeed, I too could believe this if it wasn't for the equal number of bland and forgettable sincere moments interspersed into the tracklist, moments so bland and forgettable that they're just as offensive.
'Ghost Town', 'Joan of Arc' and 'Living for Love' tackle Madonna's own fame and take the format of cookie-cut radio-friendly electro-ballads that feel more like attempts to fit in with today's pop crowd rather than stand out amongst the crowd. Some people may remember 'Living for Love' in years to come if only for it's unforgettable Brit performance, and even then this will forever be for all the wrong reasons.
'Ghost Town', 'Joan of Arc' and 'Living for Love' tackle Madonna's own fame and take the format of cookie-cut radio-friendly electro-ballads that feel more like attempts to fit in with today's pop crowd rather than stand out amongst the crowd. Some people may remember 'Living for Love' in years to come if only for it's unforgettable Brit performance, and even then this will forever be for all the wrong reasons.
![]() |
Madonna during her Brit Awards performance of 'Living for Love', accidentally being yanked off stage by her cape (yeah, I had to mention it in this review) |
Overall, Rebel Heart sways from being overly obnoxious to not obnoxious enough. The only track that really sits anywhere in the middle is 'Devil Pray. It's lyrics about sniffing glue and doing E are edgy, but not pushed to outrageous extremes. Meanwhile, the instrumental isn't a tuneless Diplo synth-squeal, nor is it a boring electro-ballad. Instead we get a guitar-strummed beat that's memorable for the simple fact that it sounds good.
Perhaps that's what's missing most from Rebel Heart - feelgood melodic songs that don't rely on gaudiness to get engrained in your head.
★★☆☆☆
TRACK TASTER:
Perhaps that's what's missing most from Rebel Heart - feelgood melodic songs that don't rely on gaudiness to get engrained in your head.
★★☆☆☆
TRACK TASTER:
Saturday 21 February 2015
Monday 19 January 2015
Thursday 16 October 2014
Review of 'STN MTN/Kauai' by Childish Gambino
Childish Gambino is the musical
alter-ego of Community actor, Donald
Glover. I was a big fan of his last album, Because
the Internet, (review here) and after hearing the single ‘Sober’ was pretty
excited for this new release, ‘STN MTN/Kauai’.
Tuesday 2 September 2014
Tuesday 22 July 2014
Review of Gangsta Stripper Music 2 by BeatKing
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