Bieber’s attempt at a sexy r&b album has failed to turn
me on.
10 years ago, Justin Bieber was a mop-haired kid making
bubblegum pop. It wasn’t socially acceptable to be a fan unless you were a
teenage girl. But then that all changed – 2015 witnessed the evolution of Baby Biebs
into Biebersaur into an inked-up adult making tropical-house-flavoured club
anthems. Suddenly, grown-ass men were singing along to him in clubs and Vice writers were declaring themselves Beliebers.
Five years on and Justin Bieber is now a married man. Sparing
us from a nauseating wedding-themed album like Chance the Rapper, he’s instead decided
to celebrate the Christian perks of newlywed life. Basically, he’s now allowed
to have sex and as a result his music is now sexual in tone. It’s the next
evolution of Bieber – BieberXXX.
But is his newfound sexual lyricism actually sexy? As much
as I tried to be seduced, no. ‘YUMMY YUMMY YUMMY YUM’ just doesn’t do it for
me. It’s as if he’s regressed back into a child. And then there are lines that are
contrastingly too mature like ‘heart full of equity, you’re an asset’. Millennials
can’t relate to that #JustinBoomer. The rest of it’s just a bit bland.
But what about Bieber’s vocal delivery? Well, he certainly
can sing and I was impressed by some of the falsettos on display. However, for
the most part his breathy whispered inflections are indistinguishable from the
cohort of other pop stars already out there. Besides from a couple hooks, most
of it is fairly forgettable and failed to cause a stirring in the loins.
As for the production, there are no uptempo club anthems
this time. It’s mostly innocuous slow trap-pop in the vein of a Drake record. There were
a couple interesting beats that caught my ear - ‘E.T.A’ has some genuinely gorgeous
guitars and ‘Running Over’ sounds like sad Wii menu music. It’s just a shame
that the latter is ruined by a guest verse from Lil Dicky (I still haven’t
forgiven him for ‘Earth’).
I don’t really have anything to say about the other guests.
In fact, I don’t really have anything else to say about this album. After successfully
reinventing himself five years ago, it feels as if he’s now lost his USP, resorting
to being just another R&b singer like Chris Brown or Zayn Malik. This album is not
as catchy, as vibrant or as personal as Purpose was. And it didn't make me want to rip my clothes off (which is my normal reaction to a sexy r&b album).
★★☆☆☆
TRACK TASTER: